In last week’s blog I found myself asking for prayer for clarity in some things that I needed to deal with and I asked that those things would come to light. After a conversation I came away knowing exactly what I needed to sort out and so I was able to deal with that quickly. (See Monday for more details).
Monday had a few strange things like Rebi asking if I wanted to do worship with Jack on Saturday (genuinely thought I was going to have a panic attack when she asked!) but everything was normal again until about 4:30 when Pete, Alex and I found each other in a deep and meaningful conversation about some of the things I’d been through/hadn’t dealt with properly. This threw up some things that I needed to sort through with God and so as soon as we got home from work (we talked until about 5:30!) I went up to my room to process things and after a couple of phone calls I felt a bit better. We went out to young adults – we had a great meal at a local pub – as we were walking into the pub I got a phone call and after a quick chat I felt so much lighter, I was full of joy and physically couldn’t stop myself from moving about, I actually had to run around the car park to calm down a little bit!
Tuesday I had a planning session with Alex for a light party this weekend, it took ages, we were trying all sorts of ideas and things that could have worked but they just didn’t! We eventually managedto sort it out with something that works – thank goodness!
I cooked dinner for us and Jack (it was super nice) but it allowed Alex to chat with Jack and Rebi . The evening was pretty boring, I caught up on some TV and then went to bed!
Wednesday it was just Rebi, Jack and me in the office – Pete and Alex were at a stewardship conference- we had prayer time which was really good, really peaceful. Then Jack and I had a planning meeting for an event at the beginning of November, we’re doing the youth work and I’m quite excited for that, I’ve got two talks to write and deliver which I guess is a little different to the format I’m used to but essentially what I’ve been doing. For the rest of the morning I wrote one of the talks which is going to be a bit of a hard hitting one but I think it’ll be good. We went into town later in the day to pay in some cheques for work before heading home. Rebi cooked dinner while I looked for my keys (first time I’ve lost them!) it was a really nice dinner, potato with bacon and halloumi and pepper and courgette.
After dinner we felt like cooking (because you know, bake off final) so we made cookie dough before deciding we should just eat that raw so we made some millionaire shortbread which looked super nice. The people who lead young adults came round to watch GBBO with us which was really nice.
Thursday was my study day. I had a look at my abilities and my personality and how they both help me to do God’s will. Loads of the questions were focused around what I find my ‘natural’ abilities to be, that was really hard for me because I don’t think of myself as a natural at many things. It was good to start looking at how God made me different to other people and how that affects how I serve and do what God wants me to do. I love the fact that He knew exactly what concoction of traits I needed to be me and if even one thing was different I would no longer be me.
Friday I didn’t start off well, I was in need of what we’ve termed an ’emotional poo’ where you just need to get all the emotion out because you’ve held on to it for a bit too long. I started to try and pack the van for Saturday but got half way through, couldn’t find the bits for it and everyone seemed to be in meetings so I couldn’t ask. Jack and I then ran through some worship stuff (I finally made up my mind about doing it) which was really good, I felt much more at ease with it all – I was worried that my voice would sound awful but it’s not too bad I guess! Kinda proud of myself to be stepping out like this, at home I don’t think I’d ever have done this, let alone been asked! The rest of the morning I did some laminating and some work on a talk for a church weekend away. Then in the afternoon we had a really short game of signs before getting back to work and packing the van ready for training and a light party on Saturday. I’d been looking forward to the training more than I expected, I only have a small part in it but I think it’s going to be good.
The interns’ first clothes matching of the year – I guess we just have impeccable taste!
Saturday was by far my best day yet and a day of firsts for me. We were in Derby delivering some training to youth and children’s workers which went really well. Jack and I led worship – I sang in front of people for the first time and I didn’t feel weird about it, God definitely gave me peace about that which was amazing! In the ministry time I prayed out loud for people that I had no idea about, I know God was working through me (and in me) that whole day – I don’t think there was a moment that I didn’t see God moving in some way or another. After the training we set up for the light party which was hectic and a little bit stressful but we got it done and the place looked pretty good. I was so nervous for this event as it was my first time fronting and first time presenting the gospel, I feel like I was pushed out of my comfort zone a lot but that’s cool because God totally had that evening – a lot of people said that they wouldn’t have known it was my first time doing something like that. I’m so glad that God was in it all because I don’t know how it would have gone if we had done it in our own strength!
Sunday I stayed at home instead of going to church. I had woken up at about 4 am to what sounded like building works – or someone sanding anyway. This noise went on for about 3 hours and even with my earplugs in and my pillow wrapped around my head I couldn’t get back to sleep so I decided that with another light party on Monday it would be wise for me to get all the rest I could. I got up around 12 and had lunch with Alex
- For continual stepping out in faith